Motherhood Is a Mutha

Most people say having a kid is like getting a tattoo on your face; you have to be certain you want it. Mike Tyson and I disagree. Act now, assess later, is what we always say to one another.

So when you find yourself in Bryce Canyon National Park, standing in front of a bin full of orphaned prairie dogs waiting for their forever home, your common sense will go out the window faster than Evander Holyfield’s ear.

Utah / June 2011 / At Least It's a Good Story

Utah / June 2011 / At Least It’s a Good Story

 

The next thing you know, you’re filling out adoption papers for Senor Peepers and taking

on the life of a single mother.

Sure, it’s a love you never knew existed, and yeah, your life suddenly has purpose. But your midsection suddenly has loose skin flaps and your lady business is ravaged. Just, like, ground-up hamburger meat.

Such are the fleeting, adrenaline-fueled highs and plunging, long-term lows of parenthood. Maybe just…sleep on it?

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